This way you don’t shoot the confidence of the person, but rather build it up and motivate them to do better things correctly, by giving them an incentive (appreciation) to do better.The statement, ‘I AM CAPTAIN OF MY SHIP’, or something in a similar vain, is not hard to interpret and very hard to misunderstand. Catch them when they do something good, instead of reprimanding them when they do something incorrectly. Write a love letter to yourself when you’re feeling good, be proud of what you have achieved and use that to weather your storm. Reaffirm: I am the captain of my ship and the master of my fate. Like brushing your teeth, or being alone at home. Do this in the silent moments, when you’re alone with yourself. This does not mean that you are a stuck-up self-obsessed prick. Muhammad Ali, his self-affirmation? I am the greatest. Because our thoughts influence our actions. Be the one who has complete faith in the fact that you can do it. There are enough people to tell you that you can’t do it. There is no place, there should be no place for a negative talk in your head. A voice that tells us we’re not good enough. A small voice that talks to us all the time. We all have a self-talk tape that plays in our heads. We want to be in a situation where we go “Hey, I’ve done this a thousand times”. We want to be in a situation where we have so much pressure because pressure builds diamonds. The problem is, we expect to be self-confident but we can’t be unless the skill, or the task we’re doing, is not novel, is not new to us. He came back, his hands were calloused, the moisture on his hands was gone and he is now playing in Europe. And he couldn’t keep that well, he wasn’t confident enough. Ivan tells the story of a goalie he recruited from Columbia, South America. To master anything, you do it for 10,000 hours. Like Malcolm Gladwell says in his book, Outliers it’s the 10,000-hour rule. There is persistence, There is repetition, There is building your familiarity with something, getting comfortable in failing and doing it over and over and over again till you know it like the back of your hand. There’s no magic button to self-confidence. When you’ve been there, done that, that’s how the confidence happens. When there is substance to you when you have stocked up on experience, failures, and mistakes when you become familiar that’s when you become confident. But there is just one way to becoming self-confident.Ĭonfidence is substance.
#I am the captain of my ship how to#
There are loads of self-help books on how to develop your confidence, how to become a more confident person and so on. If I had to describe it in one word, I’d say substance. Here’s how to cultivate and develop the skill of self-confidence by Ivan Joeseph and a little bit added by me. He says skill intentionally because self-confidence is a skill that can be trained contrary to popular belief where some people have it and some people don’t from the moment they are born. Ivan tells us that most parents come and when asked why their kids should be selected, they praise their kids on their great vision, and how they have amazing speed, skill, and precision in shooting the ball and whatnot.īut what Ivan is looking for is the skill of self-confidence. The TED talk starts with how the process of recruiting a soccer team for university happens, from the perspective of an Athletics Director at a university.
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